This is why you have to just close your eyes and jump

Sometimes when I really start to question my own sanity (because I do think some weird things), nights like tonight are very reassuring. Because tonight, I'm actually a little nervous. So far, I've just sort of blazed through most of this stuff, contacting housing agents and shipping companies and consulates, without getting truly nervous. It's all just a part of the system.

But tonight, I went over my packing list and realized, I have almost nothing to pack. Everything else that's going will go into the boxes maybe 2 days before we ship them. I need to seal up the photos/documents box, the books and pack the Christmas ornaments. But that's it.


So what do I do with myself? I obsess. I try to control an uncontrollable situation. I assess how much we're going to pay in UK taxes (answer: more than we'll pay in the US). I get all my little ducks in a row for registering as self-employed. I create my landlord reference forms. I fret about all these stupid little things that really make no difference in the end.

I just realized while I was typing this that there are three major, major areas that I don't even give a second thought to: actually leaving (as in, the flight), getting the right visas/passports (still can't talk about that yet, although I will go into all the gory details soon), and school. Oh, right. School. The whole purpose of going. And ironically, the one thing I don't obsess over and stress out about. Maybe that will change a few weeks before registration.

And now I can go to sleep without stressing anymore, because if the big stuff will work out ok in the end, the small stuff will, too.

Excuse the pics. They're a few weeks old at this point. They're pre-naughty Mini Minion bob.

Two Steps Forward, No Steps Back

Finally! I like it when things go without a hitch.

Both times we've moved out of the country (although I can't really say we've moved yet), one of the biggest concerns has been, "What will you do for work?!" This really isn't so much a concern as you would think. Mostly because it's pretty easy to survive. Trust me on this.

I have a job. It pays me fairly well. It doesn't pay me so well when the exchange rate is so high and we have to have $2600 for one-way tickets, $1000 for temp accommodation, $3,000 for our apartment deposit, $750 for shipping, potentially $1,200 for visas (we'll see). . .well, all those things add up fast, don't they? And that's not even considering food and all that great stuff. So my job has been a saving grace, but moving is expensive. Moving out of the country is REALLY expensive. Is it worth it? Yep. It is to me. It really doesn't matter WHY, either. Just like staying in this city is worth it to other people.



But people are obsessed with the job issue. It's a big one. At least, it must be, because SO MANY people are asking about it. "Can you work in London?" "What is M going to do?" "Has he applied for any jobs over there?" "Can he transfer with the company?" It goes on and on and on. So, I can now say that M (imagine with a sweeping arm gesture) officially has a job he can do in London. He's working for my company in a completely different department. I'm really interested to see how he's able to make positive changes there. I think he's got some great ideas and is exactly what a company like this needs. It should be fun.



Now he gets to work from home. He'll see what fun it is. And really, it's no fun at all. Why do it, then? Because at least I get to stay home with the kids IF they need me for something, and we save on childcare. But it's exhausting and much more difficult than most people think. In some ways, I kind of feel bad for him.

Groundhog Day

Obviously it's not really Groundhog Day (or else my calendar is REALLY messed up). But it sure feels like the movie. Today has been a waste. A complete waste. Why? Because I have had to redo so many things today that I JUST did less than a month ago.

The biggest one is the student loans. Will I need them? I dunno. But I'd rather apply and get them, and then not use them if it comes down to it. I guess the ultimate peace of mind is worth the temporary annoyance. Anyway, UCL requires all applicants to submit this entire student loan package with your SAR, MPNs, cover letters, counseling clearance, blah, blah, blah. I did this last month, before the requirements had been set for loans this year.

Yeah, I'm sure you're thinking that wasn't a wise decision. But it's not my fault. THEY (meaning UCL) made US applicants do it this way. They said, "Please submit your application and SAR so that it can be ready to go when congress finalizes the requirements." Except, of course, they put "finalise" instead of "finalize." So off my paper application went.



Today, I got an email saying I needed to re-apply for MPNs, redo the counseling, re-submit the credit check. D'oh! Fortunately, everything is electronic this time around, except the cover letter, which I was able to email. So it's done.

Life will be in and out of limbo for the next two weeks until most everything will be pretty close to being finalised (haha--did you like that?). Then we'll just start sifting through everything in full force and start packing like mad. It should be fun.


On a side note, one of my favorite people randomly called me up to go to San Jose/Santa Clara/Palo Alto on Monday. I couldn't go, but I told her early yesterday that we could do it. So we loaded up all the kids (she brought one of her girls and her 2-month-old baby) and went to the big mall and to IKEA. We drove all the way to Santa Clara so she could buy a painting at IKEA and an outfit at Janie and Jack. I love that crazy woman. :)

Baby Steps

This is life now. I was going to crop this photo, but in the end, I'm keeping it. This is the chaos. Fortunately, the bookshelf is clean and dusted, the excess books have been donated, and the small boxes we're not using have been recycled. It IS coming together. It's just a slow process. And it's a balancing act.

Today is 6/17. There is a near concrete plan. I can't get into it yet, mostly because I don't want to jinx anything. But yes, it's all taking shape. If it does actually work out, it will fall into place beautifully.

I can say that we should have everything shipped out by the end of July. I'm really hoping we can do it close to our 10-year informal reunion. There's a good chance (in the high 90s percentage-wise) that it will be that last weekend.



On another positive front, I got an email today that said the kids' passports are on their way. They're in San Jose now, so I bet I get them tomorrow. That's one less thing to stress about.

We still haven't heard anything about housing, but I read something online from someone who applied to one of the grad housing places we applied to, and he said he heard within a month. So I'm pretty confident we'll know one way or the other before we leave.


It really makes no difference. I booked our temporary accommodation at the Marriott already, so in the event that we have to house hunt, we will have a semi-cheap place to stay for up to 9 days.

Since I booked something, yes, we have dates now. I can't share them yet, because like I said, I don't want to jinx anything. But soon. I have a REALLY good feeling about our dates.

I Am Different Than You Are

This is so very, very true. And believe it or not, I am really very comfortable with who I am. I recognize both my strengths and weaknesses. Yes, I'm sometimes rash, I'm strong-willed and very sharp tongued. I can be brutally honest, and I do have a temper. If I don't like people, I will tell them. I dislike weakness, and the biggest weakness to me is stupidity. I will exploit that. But on the other side of that coin, if you earn it, I am intensely loyal. I will bend over backward to accommodate the people I care about. If I don't like you, you will know. And I'm probably a helluva lot smarter than you think I am.

I've wrestled with the tone of this blog and the tone of my everyday conversations. I'm fluent in sarcasm. I'm a storyteller, so sometimes details are amplified. When I say something is "the worst" or "the most amazing thing ever," I naturally assume people will pick up on the hyperbole. The older I get, the more I realize this isn't the case. That sucks.

Who wants to feel like they're constantly explaining aspects of their personalities? Not me. So I thought maybe I shouldn't be so. . .me. . .when dealing with 99% of the population.

But where's the fun in that?

So no, I won't be changing the way I come across. If it bothers people, oh well. Because it's impossible to like everyone. There is no law that says we must have a relationship with any given person. And I'm not one for forcing relationships. It's not my style. :)

Sometimes Everything Just Has to Stop

International moves, especially those done without the backing of a company, are stressful. Surprise, surprise. It always seems like I'm taking two steps forward and one step back. It's still progress, but sometimes it's frustrating and disheartening. Does that mean this isn't the way things should be? No. Because things are the way they are, and they couldn't be any other way.

We've had to change our plans completely. We won't be going to Southern California at all before we leave (at least not for more than a night), and after looking at airfare, we might just fly out of San Francisco. I'm very ok with this for a number of reasons. Sure, it'll make certain things more of a hassle, and it will involve lots of driving back and forth, but everything will work out in the end.


But enough about moving right now. Because there will be post after post about it. We needed a break from it, so we took it. One of M's coworkers offered us her seasonal pass to Yosemite. It's only $20 to get in, but it was still a very sweet gesture. We've been wanting to take the kids during the high waterfall season, and I'm so glad we did. They were NOT disappointed.


We didn't end up driving up to Mariposa Grove, but we can always go back in a few weeks. The important thing was to make sure the kids saw the falls before they dried up. It was a really nice day weather-wise, and I'm glad we went.